罗素的“whatihavelivedfor”原文

WhatIHaveLivedFor

Threepassions,simplebutoverwhelminglystrong,havegovernedmylife:thelongingforlove,thesearchforknowledge,andunbearablepityforthesufferingofmankind.Thesepassions,likegreatwinds,haveblownmehitherandthither,inawaywardcourse,overagreatoceanofanguish,reachingtotheveryvergeofdespair.

Ihavesoughtlove,first,becauseitbringsecstasy-ecstasysogreatthatIwouldoftenhavesacrificedalltherestoflifeforafewhoursofthisjoy.Ihavesoughtit,next,becauseitrelievesloneliness--thatterriblelonelinessinwhichoneshiveringconsciousnesslooksovertherimoftheworldintothecoldunfathomablelifelessabyss.Ihavesoughtitfinally,becauseintheunionofloveIhaveseen,inamysticminiature,theprefiguringvisionoftheheaventhatsaintsandpoetshaveimagined.ThisiswhatIsought,andthoughitmightseemtoogoodforhumanlife,thisiswhat--atlast--Ihavefound.

WithequalpassionIhavesoughtknowledge.Ihavewishedtounderstandtheheartsofmen.Ihavewishedtoknowwhythestarsshine.AndIhavetriedtoapprehendthePythagoreanpowerbywhichnumberholdsswayabovetheflux.Alittleofthis,butnotmuch,Ihaveachieved.

Loveandknowledge,sofarastheywerepossible,ledupwardtowardtheheavens.Butalwayspitybroughtmebacktoearth.Echoesofcriesofpainreverberateinmyheart.Childreninfamine,victimstorturedbyoppressors,helplessoldpeopleaburdentotheirsons,andthewholeworldofloneliness,poverty,andpainmakeamockeryofwhathumanlifeshouldbe.Ilongtoalleviatethisevil,butIcannot,andItoosuffer.

Thishasbeenmylife.Ihavefounditworthliving,andwouldgladlyliveitagainifthechancewereofferedme