超好笑的英语笑话

超好笑的英语笑话

　　有笑话，大家一起笑，这就是分享快乐，也许，快乐就是这么简単。下面我为你带来超好笑的英语笑话，希望你会喜欢。

　　超好笑的英语笑话一：hingsHaveBeenOkay　　Ayoungcouplewerebecominganxiousabouttheirfour-year-oldson,whohadnotyettalked.Theytookhimtospecialists,butthedoctorsfoundnothingwrongwithhim.Thenonemorningatbreakfasttheboysuddenlyblurted,Mom,thetoastisburned.

　　Youtalked!Youtalked!Shoutedhismother.I'msohappy!Butwhyhasittakedthislong?

　　Well,uptillnow,Saidtheboy,thingshavebeenokay.

　　一切都正常

　　一对年轻夫妇有个儿子，已经四岁了，还没有开品说话，他们对此深感焦虑。他们带他去找专家诊治，但医生们总觉得他没有毛病。后来有一天早上吃早餐时，那孩子突然开口了：妈妈，面包烤焦了。

　　你说话了!你说话了!他母亲叫了起来。我太高兴了!但为什么花了这么长的时间呢?

　　哦，在这之前，那男孩说，一切都很正常。

　　超好笑的英语笑话二：Genie　　Acouplewasgolfingonedayonavery,veryexclusivegolfcourselinedwithmillion-dollarhouses.

　　Onthethirdtee,thehusbandsaid,Honey,beverycarefulwhenyoudrivetheball.Don'tknockoutanywindows.It'llcostusafortunetofix.

　　Thewifeteedupandshankeditrightthroughthewindowofthebiggesthouseonthecourse.

　　Thehusbandcringedandsaid,Itoldyoutowatchoutforthehouses.Allright,let'sgoupthere,apologize,andseehowmuchthisisgoingtocost.

　　Theywalkedupandknockedonthedoor.Avoicesaid,Comeonin.Theyopenedthedoorandsawglassalloverthefloorandabrokenbottlelyingonitssideinthefoyer.

　　Amanonthecouchsaid,Areyouthepeoplewhobrokemywindow?

　　Uh,yeah.Sorryaboutthat,thehusbandreplied.

　　No,actually,Iwanttothankyou.I'mageniewhowastrappedforathousandyearsinsidethatbottle.You'vereleasedme.I'mallowedtograntthreewishes--I'llgiveyoueachonewish,andI'llkeepthelastoneformyself.

　　Okay,great!thehusbandsaid.Iwantamilliondollarsayearfortherestofmylife.

　　Noproblem--it'stheleastIcoulddo.Andyou,whatdoyouwant?thegeniesaid,lookingatthewife.

　　Iwantahouseineverycountryoftheworld,shesaid.

　　Consideritdone,thegeniereplied.

　　Andwhat'syourwish,genie?,thehusbandsaid.

　　Well,sinceI'vebeentrappedinthatbottle,Ihaven'thadsexwithawomaninathousandyears.Mywishistosleepwithyourwife.

　　Thehusbandlookedatthewifeandsaid,Well,wedidgetalotofmoneyandallthosehouses,honey.IguessIdon'tcare.

　　Thegenietookthewifeupstairsandravishedherfortwohours.

　　Afteritwasover,thegenierolledover,lookedatthewife,andsaid,Howoldisyourhusband,anyway?

　　Thirty-five,shereplied.

　　Andhestillbelievesingenies?...That'samazing.

　　超好笑的英语笑话三：MealsonWheels　　Onceuponatime,therewasacatwhodied.Whenshegottoheaven,Godaskedherhowshelikedbeingonearth.ShetoldtheLordthatitwasawful--shehadtosleepincoldbackalleys,wheretherewasnofoodandlifewashard.Godtoldherthathewassorryithadhadturnedoutthatway--buthere,inheaven,shewouldbehappyandHewouldgiveherthemostcomfortable,warmpillowtosleepon.

　　Thecatlaiddownuponthepillowandwashappy.

　　Afewdayslater,aboutadozenmicethatcametoheaventogetherandGodaskedthemhowtheyhadlikedearth.

　　Theearthwasnobetterforthemthanitwasthecat.

　　TheyexplainedtoGodthatitwastoughandexhaustingandtheirfeetwerewornoutfromalwaysrunningfromcatsanddogsandpeople.Godfeltbadforthemiceanddecidedtogivethemrollerskates.

　　OnedayGodseesthecatagainandaskedherhowshewaslikingheaven.Sheexplainedthatitwasabsolutelywonderful.

　　Thepillowhegaveherwasthemostcomfortableplacethatshehadeverslepton,butevenbetterthanthepillowwerethemealsonwheels.

　　超好笑的英语笑话四：WhoIsThis你是哪一个?　　MytwosisterandIwereallawayatvariouscollegesatthesametime.Oneday,afterfacingonecrisistoomanyandtiredofbeingtreatedlikejustanotherundergraduate,Iphonedhomeforsomeconsolation1andunderstandingofmyuniqueproblems.

　　Whenmydadanswered,Iimmediatelylaunchedintomylitany(连祷，冗长故事)offrustrations2withcollegelife.AsIpausedtocatchmybreath,hesaid,O.K.,honey...now,fistofall,whoisthis?

　　我和两个妹妹同时离开家去不同的大学读书。经历了太多的危机，也厌倦了受到与其他大学生相同的对待之后，有一天我给家里打了个电话，就我独有的问题寻求安慰和理解。

　　爸爸接起电话后，我立刻开始历数我大学生活中的挫折。当我停下来歇口气时，爸爸说：好啦，亲爱的...现在，首先告诉我，你是哪一个?