求三人表演的英语剧本

老同学（搞笑校园短剧）

演员：小石头老干巴大杂面小丹

小丹：这不嘛，大学毕业十来年，当年的同学见面都难，有的有钱有的没钱，穷的不把富来奔，富的与穷家也无言。同学情感可不能白费，所以我们今天啊开个同学会，只为交流情感，不在乎喝不喝醉，呵呵。（收拾屋子）

大杂面：小丹呐，你咋还忙活呢，快做饭吧，老同学都快来了。哎，我还得告诉你几句：今天时间也不晚了，记住今天聚会赵卫锋是重点，他现在是辛氏企业的经理，百分百一个大款。咱今天要是把他整高兴了，那咱们就抱住那金饭碗了，哈哈哈哈！

小丹：你怎么那么见钱眼开呢？难道同学之间也要讲钱？

大杂面：小丹你咋这么不懂事呢，同学同学，同样是学生但不一样学习。当年学习不努力，他穷了也不能和咱们生气啊，当年刻苦学习的，他有钱也证明是自己努力。你好比当年的辛井水吧，倒是挺能折腾的，活动参加不少，就是不努力学习，听说毕业就失业了，现在在家种地，你说这是何必。

小丹：人家辛井水怎么也是同学啊，你可不能厚此薄彼啊。

大杂面：啊，对啊，你曾经还和辛井水谈过一段恋爱，怪不得你一直在为他说话呢。你们可别当着我的面情情爱爱，别怪我翻脸让他歇菜！

小丹：你！哼！（生气的下）（大杂面坐下看报纸）

小石头：（接电话）外！我是赵卫锋，哎呀，辛总啊，对来大杂面家开同学会，您放心吧，我一定会把这事办的清清楚楚，明明白白的，好好，再见！

（敲门）开门！

大杂面：来了，你好你是？

小石头：我是赵卫锋！

大杂面：卫锋，哎呀！（拥抱）我想死你了，咱们十年没有见面了吧，我都想四你了！怎么样您母亲还好吗？

小石头：还好！

大杂面：您父亲还好吧？

小石头：还好！

大杂面：您家里都好吧？

小石头：还好！

（小丹出来）

小丹：哎呀！小石头啊！

小石头：恩？你是？

大杂面：小石头？哎？这位是赵卫锋赵经理，你怎么能……

小丹：啊，原来是赵经理啊，那你们坐下聊啊！

（赵卫锋手机响，接电话）

小石头：外，辛总啊！什么？好，我马上过去！

老同学我公司有点事情我得马上过去，好吗？咱们有机会再聚！

（赵卫锋下）

大杂面：完了，完了，他走了，这同学会还开啥了？饺子包了，来人就喝茶吧！

（老干巴上，敲门）

小丹：谁啊？

老干巴：我！

小丹：老干巴？

老干巴：小丹？诶呀吗呀

小丹：诶呀！

大杂面：小丹谁啊？

小丹：老干巴快进来！军言，你看谁来了

大杂面：啊，送煤气罐的吧，放里边吧！

小丹：他好似咱们的老同学老干巴啊

大杂面：老干巴？哪个老干巴啊

老干巴：不认识我了？大杂面？你忘了我，我可记得你呀！

大杂面：我叫张军言不叫大杂面，（不屑的）里面坐吧。

小丹：（拉住老干巴的手）老干巴，现在干啥呢，可挺长时间没有看见你了啊。

老干巴：啊，我那什么……

大杂面：咳！小丹，你去烧点开水去！

老干巴：大杂面！不张军言，你现在干啥啊？

大杂面：呀，也没干啥！就搞几个小项目呗！

老干巴：啥项目啊？

大杂面：啊，没啥，也就是给北极星供暖，把太平洋变浅，克隆一个北朝鲜，再把黑洞填满。

老干巴：诶呀！那你还挺忙啊！

大杂面：呵呵，一般！老同学，那你忙写啥啊都？

老干巴：我跟你比起来差远了，成天净鼓动农作物了。

大杂面：（骄傲的）那也行，一年也能对付个一两千！

老干巴：哪能啊，一年也就八九百——万！

大杂面：啊，八九百？万？不是我说你老干巴，你跟我你吹啥啊？啊，咱们当年都农村出来的，谁不知道一年挣多少啊，啊？你有啥困难到我这你装啥啊，我也不是不能帮你。我这现在家业好几十万，光自行车我就好几个。等会你把那个89年的推走吧，没事别老走着多累，骑去呗！

老干巴：恩，我没走着！

大杂面：骑倒骑驴啊？那玩意更累疼，还不如自行车呢！

老干巴：不是……

（小丹上）

小丹：你们唠啥呢？来喝水！

大杂面：小丹，把咱们家那些破衣服啥的给老干巴拿走点，买衣服太贵了。

小丹：哎！

（小丹拿出一件衣服）

大杂面：你拿那不我的衣服吗？

小丹：那你不说给老干巴吗？

大杂面：我说你塞暖气空子里那几件！

小丹：那还能穿吗？

大杂面：老干巴他还能嫌咱们呐？

老干巴：没事，老同学嘛，永远都是老同学！

小丹：老干巴，还没有吃饭吧？

大杂面：啧！人家老干巴还能不吃饭？再说咱家菜油太大，老干巴能吃惯吗？回头再拉肚子可咋整。给老干巴包几个馒头拿走，人家老干巴没准还有急事呢！

小丹：张军言，你是不是有点过分了？

老干巴：那什么，没事，小丹，军言你们忙着啊，我先走了！

（赵卫锋敲门）

大杂面：这又是谁啊？这个闹停！

（开门）

大杂面：诶呀！卫锋！诶呀，你可想死我了，太好了，小丹快炒菜，今天别走了啊，就在这住！

小石头：不的了，我们懂事长在这吧？

大杂面：懂事长？没有啊！

老干巴：（过来）小石头，事情办妥了？

小石头：辛哥，办妥了，外商直接就拨款2000万！

老干巴：好，咱们走吧！

大杂面：辛哥！诶呀，我想死你了！太好了，小丹快去买海鲜，辛哥，今天别走了，我给你定酒店！诶呀，快给辛哥泡龙井啊，这破衣服你又翻出来干啥呀？辛哥，快坐下！

老干巴：军言……

大杂面：辛哥你还是叫我大杂面亲切！

老干巴：你还记得自己曾经叫大杂面？你记得你这个名字怎么来的吗？

大杂面：当然记得，小的时候家里穷，我每天都带一个玉米面上学，同学们都叫我大杂面，但是没有一个人瞧不起我，他们都来帮助我！

老干巴：那时候我每天都带一个糖馒头上学，每次都用馒头换你的杂面吃。不是我爱吃杂面，而是我想让你知道，世界上除了钱之外，还有情感存在！军言，对辛懂事长你就可以请海鲜，住酒店，对老干巴你就连多呆一会你都不愿意吗？老同学老同学，就算我们再有钱，也不能忘记了曾经的老同学啊！

大杂面：老干巴！呜——

（音乐响起）

~~~

Oldclassmates(artcampusdrama)

Cast:smallstoneontheoldDanZamianbigThelephoraganbajunZang

Xiao-Dan:Thisisnotjustaftergraduatingfromuniversity10years,wasdifficulttomeetstudents,andsomemoneysomemoneyandthepoortotherichnottoBen,richandpoorfamiliesalsospeechless.Emotionalstudentscannotwasted,soweahopenaclassmate,onlyfortheexchangeofemotion,donotcaretodrinkdonotgetdrunk,huh.(Packinghouse)

BigZamian:smallDandiploma,youalsospentyesterday,itquicklycookingit,theoldclassmatescome.Hey,Imusttellyouafewwords:ThistimeisnottoolatetoremembergathertodayWei-fengisthekey,heisnowthemanagerofHsinEnterprise,awealthy100%.Ourwholetodayifhewashappy,thenLet'sclingonthegoldenricebowl,YouYou!

Xiao-Dan:Sohowdoyoumoneyeyes?Dostudentshavealsosaymoney?

BigZamian:smallDannightsoyoudonotknowanything,thestudentsstudents,butstudentsarenotthesameaslearning.Thenlearningsleep,hecannotandthepoorLetangryah,thatassiduousstudy,healsoprovedtobemoneyoftheirown.YoulikeitthenXinWell,itisquiteabletodisruption,andtoparticipateinmanyactivitiesthatsleepstudy,weheardthatgraduateunemployment,nowattheland,yousaythisiswhy.

Xiao-Dan:WellhowarepeopleXinstudentsah,ah,youcanbepartial.

BigZamian:ah,ah,youhavealsotalkedaboutaperiodofwellwaterandXinlove,nowonderyouhavebeeninitforhimtospeak.Youcannotfacethesituationinfrontofmylovelove,IdecidetolethimBieguaiXiecai!

Xiao-Dan:You!Sing!(Angrythenext)(sitdownandlookatthenewspapersZamian)

Smallstones:(phone),!IZhaoFeng,wow,Xintotalah,hometoalargeZamianstudents,yourestassuredit,Iwilldefinitelydothisclearly,out-and-out,well,good-bye!

(Knockonthedoor)openthedoor!

BigZamian:comehere,youHello,yes?

Smallstone:Iwasvisitingfront!

BigZamian:Wei-feng,wow!(Hug)Ithinkyoudie,Let'snot10yearstomeetthebar,Iwantto4you!Howkindyourmotheralsookay?

Smallstone:okay!

BigZamian:YourfatheralsoOK?

Smallstone:okay!

BigZamian:YourhomeisOK?

Smallstone:okay!

(Dansmallout)

Xiao-Dan:Ah!Smallstoneah!

Smallstone:TU?Youyes?

Zamianlarge:smallstone?Hey?ThisisWei-fengDiaojingli,howcanyou……

Xiao-Dan:ah,itwasDiaojingliah,thenyousitdownandchataboutah!

(Wei-fengcellphone,thephone)

Smallstone:,Xintotalah!What?,AndIimmediatelypast!

Oldclassmates,somethingsmycompanyIimmediatelypast,okay?WebothhavetheopportunitytoZaiju!

(Wei-fengunder)

BigZamian:finished,finished,gone,itwillalsoopen啥students?Dumplingspackage,来人ontea!

(ThelephoraganbajunZangold,theknockonthedoor)

Xiao-Dan:Shuie?

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:I!

Xiao-Dan:OldThelephoraganbajunZang?

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:smallDan?Ahahlongperiodoftime?

Xiao-Dan:longperiodoftime!

BigZamian:DanShuiAsmall?

Xiao-Dan:OldThelephoraganbajunZangcomingfast!Armystatement,youseewhoisgoingtothe

BigZamian:ah,itsentthegastank,putinside!

Xiao-Dan:WebothlikehisoldclassmatesoldahThelephoraganbajunZang

BigZamian:OldThelephoraganbajunZang?WhicholdahThelephoraganbajunZang

ThelephoraganbajunZangold:Idonotknow?Zamianbig?Youforgotme,andIrecalledyou!

BigZamian:MynameisZhangstatementisnotbigZamian,(disdain)sittinginsideit.

Xiao-Dan:(attractiontotheoldhandsThelephoraganbajunZang)ThelephoraganbajunZangoldnowabidebyrelevantregulations,itcouldbequitealongtimenoseeyouah.

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:ah,thatwhatI……

BigZamian:cough!Xiao-Dan,youpointtoburntothewater!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:LargeZamian!ZhangJunandnotwords,youabidebyrelevantregulationsah?

BigZamian:ah,didnotabidebyrelevantregulations!Toengageinafewsmallprojectshymns!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:啥projectah?

BigZamian:ah,没啥,thatis,toPolarisheating,thePacificshallow,aNorthKoreancloning,andthenfilltheblackhole.

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:longperiodoftime!Futingmangayou!

BigZamian:Oh,General!Oldclassmates,thenyouarebusywritingShae?

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:Itellyoufarworsethanup,Naritanetinstigatedthecrops.

BigZamian:(pride)thatalso,ayearcandealwitha2000!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:Howcouldah,itBajiubaiyear-10,000!

BigZamian:ah,Bajiubai?10,000?NilaoThelephoraganbajunZangisnotwhatIsaid,youtoldmeyoublowShae?Ah,letoutthatallruralareas,whodonotknowhowmanyah-earningyear,ah?YouwielddifficulttomewithShaeyou,Icannothelpyou.Iamnowpossessionshundredsofthousands,lightbike,Ilikeafew.,Andsowillyouputthat89Selection走吧,nothingmorethananothertiredoldwalk,ridetohymns!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:TU,Ididnotwalk!

BigZamian:ridinginvertedQilvah?Nawanyipainmoretiredthanabike?

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:No……

(OnthesmallDan)

Xiao-Dan:Doyouthesechatsaboutnormal,Shane?Todrink!

BigZamian:smallDan,Let'sbreakthoseclotheshometotheold啥ThelephoraganbajunZangaway,tooexpensivetobuyclothes.

Xiao-Dan:hey!

(Danshowasmallclothing)

Zamianlarge:thatyoudonottakemyclothes?

Xiao-Dan:ThenyoudonotsaythattotheoldThelephoraganbajunZang?

BigZamian:IsaidyouCypriotHeatingemptyyardthatfew!

Xiao-Dan:Itcanwear?

BigZamian:OldThelephoraganbajunZangHealsosuspectedLetdiploma?

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:nothing,justoldclassmates,oldclassmatesareforever!

Xiao-Dan:OldThelephoraganbajunZang,nodinner?

BigZamian:Ze!ThelephoraganbajunZangoldpeoplecannoteat?Saytoomuchanymorevegetableoil,usedtoeatThelephoraganbajunZangold?Zezhengdiarrheacanbebackagain.Totheold-ThelephoraganbajunZangtookseveralsteamedbread,oldpeopleThelephoraganbajunZangchancesareemergencies?

Xiao-Dan:ZhangYan,youarenotabittoomuch?

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:Whatthen,nothing,smallDan,themilitarystatementyoubusyah,Iamahead!

(Wei-fengknockedatthedoor)

Zamianlarge:ThisisShuie?This闹Stop!

(Open)

Zamianlarge:longperiodoftime!Wei-feng!Ahlongperiodoftime,youcandie,Iwouldliketo,verygood,smallcookingDanfasttodayBiezoutheah,inthislive!

Smallstone:notatall,weDongshichanginthis?

BigZamian:Dongshichang?Noah!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:(from)smallstone,thingsget?

Smallstone:Xinge,complete,directforeignfundingto20million!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:Well,let走吧!

BigZamian:Xinge!诶ah,Iwantedtodieyou!Verygood,smallbuyseafoodDanfast,Xinge,Biezoutoday,Iwillgiveyouthehotel!诶ah,soontoXingebubbleLongjingah,brokenupbytheclothesyouabidebyrelevantregulationsah?Xinge,sitdownfast!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:Armystatement……

BigZamian:XingeyoustillaskmetotheZamiancordial!

OldThelephoraganbajunZang:DoyoustillremembertheirownoncetoldtheZamian?Yourememberhowyournameto?

BigZamian:Ofcourseremember,whenthesmallhomepoorer,everydayIgotoschoolwithacornmeal,students都叫IZamianbig,butnoonelookdownonmethattheycametohelpme!

ThelephoraganbajunZangold:everydaywhenItakeasugarbunstoschool,everytimeyouchangetheZamiansteamedbreadtoeat.Zamianisnotmyfavorite,butIwantyoutoknowthattheworldapartfromthemoney,thereareemotionalexistence!ArmystatementonthesymplecticDongshichangyoucanpleaseseafood,livehotels,theoldThelephoraganbajunZangyouwillbeaneven多呆youdonotwantto?Youroldclassmateoldclassmates,evenifwehavemoneyagain,wecannotforgettheoldstudents,whoah!

BigZamian:OldThelephoraganbajunZang!Ming--

多长时间我就不太清楚了