谁有简单的英语相声

一、LittleRedRidingHood

第一场：LittleRedRidingHood家

Mum：(妈妈拿着一个篮子，把桌子上的水果放在篮子里）

LittleRedRidingHood:(唱着歌，欢快地跑进来）Hi,mummy,whatareyoudoing?

Mum：（一边把水果放在篮子里，心事重重地说）Grandmaisill.HerearesomeapplesandbananasforGrandma.TakethemtoGrandma.

LittleRedRidingHood：（边提起篮子，边点头说）Ok!

Mum：（亲切地看着LittleRedRidingHood说）Begood.Becareful.

LittleRedRidingHood：Yes,mummy．Goodbye,mummy.

Mum：Bye-bye.Darling.

第二场：在路上

(一阵轻快的音乐由远而近，LittleRedRidingHood挎着篮子蹦跳跳地跳到花草旁)

LittleRedRidingHood：Wow！Flowers,howbeautiful!（放下篮子采花）Oneflower,twoflowers,threeflowers.

Wolf：（wolf大步地走上台）Iamwolf.Iamhungry.(做找东西状,东张西望)Hereisalittleredridinghood.Hi!LittleRedRidingHood.Whereareyougoing?(做狡猾的样子和LittleRedRidingHood打招呼)

LittleRedRidingHood：(手摸辫子，天真地回答)ToGrandma’s．Grandmaisill.

Wolf：（自言自语）I'lleatGrandma.But……（对LittleRedRidingHood说）Hey,look!6littlebabyducks.

LittleRedRidingHood：(和6只鸭子随着音乐翩翩起舞)

Wolf：（悄悄地藏到大树后）

LittleRedRidingHood：（停止跳舞）Hello!Babyducks，howareyou?

SixDucks：We’refine．Thankyou．Whereareyougoing?

LittleRedRidingHood：ToGrandma’s．Oh,Imustgo,bye.

SixDucks：Goodbye．

第三场：Grandma家

Grandma：（喘着气出场，颤颤悠悠地走到床前，吃力地坐到床边，喘了几口，打几个哈欠，慢吞吞地躺倒在床上。）

Wolf：（从树后出来，边走边说）Iamveryhungrynow.(做找寻的样子)WhereisGrandma’shouse?(高兴地对观众说)Aha,it’shere.(敲门)Bang,Bang,Bang．

Grandma：Whoisit？

Wolf：（装出LittleRedRidingHood的声音，一边得意地摇动尾巴，一边说）It’sme.LittleRedRidingHood.

Grandma：(边说边起床)Comein,comein.

Wolf：(得意洋洋地走到床边)Grandma,I’lleatyou.

Grandma：（惊慌失措地抓紧衣服，瞪着眼睛，边叫迫从床上滚到地上）

灰狼把外婆吞到了肚子里。

Wolf：（得意地拍拍肚子，翘起大拇指）Yummy！I’llsleep.

LittleRedRidingHood：(高兴地敲门)Grandma．Grandma．

Wolf：(装扮成Grandma的声音)Whoisit？

LittleRedRidingHood：It’sme。LittleRedRidingHood.Whatastrangenoise!

Wolf：Comein，Comein.

LittleRedRidingHood：(蹦跳着进来，把篮子放在桌子上，走到床前一看，跳回几步)Oh!Whatarebigears!

Wolf：Icanlistentoyoursweetvoice.

LittleRedRidingHood：Wow!Whatabigeyes!

Wolf：Icanseeyouprettyface.

LittleRedRidingHood：Oh!Whatabighand.

Wolf：Icanhugyou.

LittleRedRidingHood：（跪在床前，拉起Wolf的手，边摸边说）Look!Whatabighands?

Wolf：(从床上跳起来说)Icaneatyou!

LittleRedRidingHood：(拼命地跑)Oh！No!No!

Wolf：（追到LittleRedRidingHood，做吃状，拍拍肚子说）It’sdelicious.Istillsleep.Ilikesleeping.

Hunter：(一边拿着枪，一边做寻找状出场)Where’sthewolf?Look!Adoor．(推门)Thewolfissleeping.

Wolf：(发出呼呼的响声)

Hunter：(端起枪想打，又放下)Whatabigstomach!(摸摸Wolf的肚子)GrandmaandLittleRedRidingHoodareinside.Imustbehurry．(从桌子上拿起剪刀，举起)Look!Scissors.(做剪Wolf的肚子)Cut,cut,cut.

LittleRedRidingHood/Grandma：Thankyou．

Hunter：Grandma,givemesomeneedlesandthread．LittleRidingHood,Givemesomestones．

Grandma：(从桌子上拿来针线)

LittleRedRidingHood：(搬来几个石头)One,two,three.

Hunter：(把小石头装进Wolf的衣服里)

Grandma：I'llthreadit.

Hunter：(拿起枪)Wokeup!

Wolf：(起床，两手托着大肚子)Mystomachissoheavy.

Hunter：Youbigbadwolf,raiseyourarms!

Wolf：(边跑边说)Help!Don’tshotme!

Hunter：（开枪）Bang,bang!

Wolf：(应声倒下)

Hunter：Thebadwolfisdead．

LittleRedRidingHood和Grandma：Yeah!Thankyou．

二、T---TigerF---FoxR---RabbitB---BirdFr---FrogB----Bear(狐假虎威)Tiger:I’magreattiger.I’mverystrong.I’mverybrave.I’mthekingoftheforest.ButnowI’mveryhungry.Imustfindsth.toeatatonce,orI’lldieimmediately.Oh,there’snothinghere.Andhereisnothing,either.Oh,Iwanttohavearest.(Sleepsoundly)Fox:I’mafox.Youcansee,I’mprettyandlovely.I’mgoodatcheating0andtellinglies.JustnowIcheatedacrewoutofapieceofmeat.Mm,Mm,Mm.Howdeliciousitis!Tiger:Ah,afox.Agoodmeal.Ah,agoodmeal.Fox:Oh,myGod!WhatshouldIdo?Yes,Ihaveagoodidea.Yes,agoodidea.Hello!Tigersister!Howareyou?Tiger:Notsogood.I’mveryhungrynow.Iwanttoeatyou.Fox:Oh,mydear!Howdareyousaythat!I’mthekingoftheforest!I’mthekingoftheforest!Ifyouwanttoeatme,Iwillletyoudierightnow.Tiger:Sheistheking.Sheischeatingme.Ican’tbeliveher.I’mthekingoftheforesthere.Fox:Ifyoudon’tbelieveme,justfollowmeandseewhoisthekingoftheforest.Tiger:Ok.Let’sgo.Rabbit:I’marabbit.Iliketoeataturnip.Ah,abigturnip.Oh!It’stoohard.Ican’tpullitout.Bird:I’mabird.Rabbit:Hi!Bird:Hi!Whataredoinghere,MissRabbit?CanIhelpyou?Rabbit:Yes,please.Frog:I’mafrog.Hello!Whatareyoudoinghere?WhatcanIdoforyou?R&B:Yes,comeon!Frog:Ok!I’mcoming!Bear:I’mabigbrownbear.Hello,everyone!Whatareyoudoinghere?R,B&F:Comeon!Comeon!Mr.Bear!Youaresostrong.Pleasecomehere.Thereisabigturnip.Weareallpulingitout.Pleasecomeandhelpus.Bear:Ok!I’mcoming.Fox:Hello,Bear!Bear:Hi,Fox.Oh,atiger!(runaway)Fox:Hello,Frog!Frog:Hi,Fox.Oh,atiger!(runaway)Fox:Hello,Bird!Bird:Hi,Fox.Oh,atiger!(runaway)Fox:Hello,Rabbit!Rabbit:Hi,Fox.Oh,atiger!(runaway)Fox:Tiger,Now,yousee.Theyaresofrightened!Theyallrunaway!Tiger:Yes,youareright.It’strue.I’mverysorry.Youarethekingoftheforest.That’sallright.Iwillrunaway.Heistheking.Heistheking.Fox:Wa!Thereisabigturnip.Now,theturnipbelongstome.