悬赏200帮忙看一下我的英语作文(急)

1.Myfamily

Letmeintroducemyfamily.Therearefivepeopleinmyfamily.Theyaremygrandfather,myfather,mymother,myeldersisterandme.

Mygrandfatheris81yearsold.Inthepast,heonlylivedwithmygrandmother.Butmygrandmotherdied5yearsago,soheliveswithustogethernow.Myfatheris47yearsold.Myfather'shobbyisgoingmountainclimbing.Hegoesmountainclimbingwithhisfriendsonceortwiceamonth.AndheenjoysdrinkingChinesetea.Thereisaroomfordrinkingteainmyhouse.HeusuallydrinksChineseteaintheroom.Mymotheris43yearsold.Sheisgoodatcooking.Shewakesupintheearlymorningandpreparesbreakfastforthefamily.Herfoodisdelicious.Myeldersisteris19yearsold.Sheislivinginmyaunt'shouseinBeijing.Sheisstudyingtheretoentertheuniversity.SheisgoodatEnglish.Iam15yearsold.Myhobbyisplayingsoccerandplayingcomputergames.

Ilovemyfamily.

2.Myfavoritehobby.

Letmeintroducemyfavoritehobby.

Myfavoritehobbyisplayingcomputergames.IthasalotoffunandIcangetridofstressbyplayingcomputergames.ButIcanonlyplaycomputergamesattheweekend.AndIcanplay2hoursadayattheweekend.Myfavoritecomputergameispopkart.Itisaracinggame.Iusuallyplaycomputergameswithmyfriends.Playingwithfriendsismoreinteresting.Thesedaysmoreandmorepeopleinmyclasshavestartedtoplaypopkart.Sowealwaysplaytogether.

TheveryreasonIlikethecomputergamesisthatitisnoteasytomakeanyprogressinthegame.WheneveImadegreatprogressinit,Iwaswildwithjoy.AndmyfriendsalsosharedmyhappinessandIsharedtheirs.

Thisismyfavoritehobby.Ienjoyitverymuchandcanrelaxmyselfbyit!

3.MyPlanfortheNextYear.

NextyearIwillbeinthethirdyearofmiddleschool.Ihavesomeplansforthenextyear.

First,Iamplanningtostudyhardernextyear.Thethirdyearofmymiddleschoolisveryimportant,soIwillstudyhardertogetbettergradestoenteragoodseniorhighschool.Second,Iamplanningtogomountainclimbingforthesakeofmyhealth.UsuallyIdon'tgetenoughexercise.SoIamgoingtogomountainclimbingtoimprovemyfitness.Thereisasmallmountaininfrontofmyhouse,soitisveryconvenienttogomountainclimbing.MylastplanforthenextyearistotravelaroundShanghai.Idon'tknowShanghaiverywellbecauseIjustcametoShanghaithisyear.SoIwoudliketotravelaroundShanghaitoknowmoreaboutthiscity.Theseareallofmyplansforthenextyear.

IhopeIcanfulfillmyplansnextyear.

（已对部分错误做了修改，并增加些内容。说实话你的作文还是写得不错的。）

（英语牛人团一英语教师）